the time has come...

to end my adventures here.

See....this blog has finished it's purpose. (at least, in my eyes it has....)  I started this blog as a way to document my adventures through college, my adventures in dating, my frustrations and joys with ballet at BYU and really....all the cool kids (read: the writers/readers of the 100 Hour Board at BYU) were doing it, so I decided to jump on that bandwagon.

And you know what? I've moved on from all of those worlds. I'm not in school anymore (thank goodness!), I'm engaged and don't have crazy dating stories anymore (hurrah!), I'm not dancing as much these days and I no longer read the 100 Hour Board. Like ever. So...this is the end of love and war...at least it's the end of a battle. On to better and brighter things!

I will always be grateful to the 100 Hour Board and many of their writers for influencing me to start this here blog. It has brought about many GREAT friendships, killed at least one relationship, and in the end helped me to find a voice in writing.

I don't want to completely give up blogging, and while my new blog is NOT private, I'm not going to post a link to it here. If you want to keep following just shoot me an email, leave a comment, or look for the links that happen to show up on my Facebook account.

I really hope you'll want to keep following me, but if you're trying to weed out people from your Google Reader (is anybody else's as ridiculous as mine?! sheesh!) then now would be the time and I won't even notice.

Thanks again for a great 7+ years guys. You're awesome!

It's official!

so....you might have noticed (if we're friends) on Facebook and Twitter....but last night I got engaged to Soldier Boy!

That's right! It's officially official! I'm getting MARRIED!!!! I am so excited and stoked to get to marry my best friend. Last night was AMAZING.

It all started shortly after we both got home from work, Soldier Boy suggested that we go to the Blue Iguana. This restaurant holds a lot of memories for us as it is one of the places we went near the very beginning of our relationship (before we were officially dating, in fact). The food was delicious as always.

After dinner Solider Boy suggested that we go to the Gallivan Center Outdoor Ice Skating Rink. This was something we had seen as an idea to do this weekend, and I was so excited to get to do that with him. :o)

At one point I gave Soldier Boy a really hard time about not having a ring yet...and he teased me by suggesting that it would happen up in his hometown because he knows the area better over there. Not five minutes later we were on the ice again "dancing" in the middle and he looked at me, told me he loved me and I said, "I love you too!" and he then said "really? well then...." and he got down on one knee pulled out my ring and asked me to marry him.

:) :) :) :) :) 

I said yes and that folks, is how I got engaged to my best friend last night! I'm so excited to start the process of planning this wedding and start our life together. :)

my ring. this picture doesn't do it justice. It is gorgeous!!

One week....

I realize today is Tuesday and that usually means that I post a wonderful Tender Mercy Tuesday post about blessings in my life. I do have lots of things to be grateful right now, but honestly I'm still riding cloud 9 as I think about what happened one week ago today.

Speaking of one week, every time I think of that phrase I think of this fun song  by the Barenaked Ladies. Also fun fact: the theme song to my favorite tv show The Big Bang Theory? Sung by the Barenaked Ladies. I knew they were awesome for a reason. ;)

Anyways. I had a great weekend - it was filled with zumba, dinner with friends, and Ballet West with Soldier Boy aka my boyfriend. (I don't think I'll ever get tired of calling him my boyfriend. *grin*) I'll post a recap about that later - I was slightly disappointed with parts of it and wowed with others. :o) In the meantime, I'm enjoying the fact that I'm dating the sweetest guy in the entire world. :o) Have a great tax day folks!

Just a few....Thursday Things!

Hi dearest friends! It's been a crazy few days and my brain is fried and I still have to work tomorrow. :P However! Exciting things ARE happening this weekend and I'm rather excited about everything, so let's get to it shall we?!

• It's been a VERY long TWELVE days, but tonight I finally get to see Soldier Boy again. I'm so giddy with excitement, it's ridiculous. Here's hoping I can hold it together through my ballet class tonight....

• We're exchanging valentines tonight....:o) Here's a peak at what Soldier Boy's looks like:

• cute, right? (His valentine is glued to a box of cereal, in case you didn't figure that out by the cheesy saying. ;) )

• Tomorrow night is going to include me and Roommate A going to a stake activity. I'm going to be her wing woman while we go "speed dating: bingo style." ha ha ha. should be entertaining to say the least.

• I think I am MOST excited for Saturday.

• See Saturday....Saturday I'm going to see Ballet West's Don Quixote. It's supposedly FANTASTIC. (at least, that's what EVERYONE keeps telling me)

• Also, I'm going to the Blue Iguana with Soldier Boy prior to the ballet. I've heard mixed reviews of the place, and I'm intrigued to try it.

• I'm going to look AMAZING in my dress. I promise to post a picture later. :o)

• I have left all my shows in my hulu que to watch while I get ready for the ballet. It's going to be fun times.

• Next week is looking fantastic. :o) 

• Basically, life is really, REALLY good.

craziness

Hi guys. So....I started a post on Friday, but then I didn't ever get around to finishing it and posting it. Then I stayed away from the internets (for the most part) this weekend. See...it was show weekend. That meant I spent all afternoon/evening Friday and Saturday at the Covey Center for the Arts. It was fun and exhausting all in one. Also - I realize I didn't finish the 10-day challenge. My life blew up with the show (some crazy stuff hit the fan late Thursday) and I really couldn't think of something to do PLUS the one thing I did think of possibly doing, I couldn't do because I wasn't allowed to wear jeans to work on Friday due to the board of directors meeting that happened. Oh well. C'est la vie.

The silver lining though to this weekend was that Solider Boy stuck around on Friday. We went to lunch together and then he came and suppported me and my ballet company at the performance that night. It was SO NICE to have him with me. We followed up the show with dinner w/a good friend of mine and then went back to my place to talk and just chill. He ended up staying another (unplanned, but still good) night in UT county and we got to spend a bit of time together Saturday morning before he left on his week long trip to California. sigh. I miss him.

Also, I've realized that I haven't really blogged about a lot of what happened last weekend (the 28/29 of January) or what not...and I'm pretty sure I don't want to go into all of the details about it all. It's a VERY long story and pretty personal, but the jist of it is this: we're not really dating right now and we're going to be that way for a little while. It's a complicated mess, but Solider Boy is my future boyfriend. One of my friends described it as us being "engaged to be in a relationship." We don't have a timeline for when we will be officially dating, but in the meantime we are good friends strengthening our friendship. We hang out and talk to each other because we both need that support. I honestly really like where we are in our relationship and I'm so grateful for this time to learn more about him and grow closer together without all the other emotional/physical aspects of a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship getting in the way. We both really like each other and we're excited to see where things go, when they can go. So...Soldier Boy isn't disappearing completely, I just don't get to kiss him or hold his hand right now. :'(

Anywho...there's the reader's digest version of where things are for us right now. :o) Have a great Monday y'all!

Dating Battle Stories: Soldier Boy

So in case you missed it, I kissed a boy the other day. Well, more like a week ago. And I really liked it. A lot. A few facts about this boy, who we shall hereafter call Soldier Boy, before I tell you a few of my favorite stories that have happened since our first kiss:

• he's in the military.
• he's served a tour of duty in Iraq.
• he taught Salsa dancing in Iraq.
• I know him from Blue Tango.
• He's my favorite dance partner.
• We always have the best dances.
• I've crushed on him for a long time.
• He's divorced and has a daughter.
• this doesn't bother me
• by the time I see him tomorrow night it will have been ~94 hours since I last saw him. I can hardly wait.
• I'm grateful that I am always so busy in the evenings. It's TOTALLY making this easier.
• He lives 2ish hours away.
• Him living 2+ hours away isn't an issue yet....and hopefully it won't ever make it to "issue" status. I think we can make this work.
• We spent all weekend together. ;)
• Last night we talked on the phone for 2 hours without any lack of conversation topic. It was actually one of the best phone conversations I have ever had.

Okay, so now that you know just a little bit about Soldier Boy let me tell you my  favorite moments from this weekend.

Starting with Thursday - hands down my favorite part was kissing him. And yes, *I* kissed him. Not the other way around. I had NEVER done this before...until 6 days ago. :o) Let me just say, going in and kissing someone is scary, but really, really fun. And it's led us on a great adventure so far. So, you're probably wondering how that happened right? right. Well. After dancing on Thursday night he walked me to my car. It was already late and I had to work the next day, but as we’re talking outside of my car, I offer to drive to him to his car (on the other side of the bldg etc.) and we ended up talking in my car for hours. About everything. Random stuff. We talked about kissing. etc. (probably over shared. but that's how I roll. oh well.) 

Well. At one point I sorta lean in (and I had thought about kissing him at this point several times) and he gives me this look...and I say "penny for your thoughts." and he says "right now?" and I say, "yup." and he leans in fairly close and says, "penny for YOUR thoughts." and I was all, "uh-huh, I asked you first." and he said, " I know. This is my response (moves a hair closer). Penny for your thoughts." and the first thought I have is that I should kiss him.  I sorta lean back a tad, had a quick little battle with my mind and my heart...and then I leaned in and kissed him with every part of my being. Guess what? He kissed me back. BOY did he kiss me back. [ps he's a really good kisser. let it be written. let it be done. or something like that] moving on....

Saturday - Soldier Boy had drill all weekend up in SLC. So, he was closer than normal on the weekend and we took advantage of that closeness. He took me on a date! We went to dinner, swing dancing on BYU campus and then back to my place to watch Tangled. We had a wonderful evening and got to know each other a bit. He admitted to having had liked me for a long time, but then Monkey Man got in the way for a short bit. However, here we are making this something happen.

Sunday - after a few texts and a cute snow angel made especially for me, Solider Boy showed up on my doorstep....in uniform. [insert girly squeal here.] Seriously, guys, I know everyone always says how a guy in uniform is the best thing ever. IT'S TRUE. Soldier Boy is cute, but man alive he is even cuter in his uniform. I liked. Anyways. Back to the moment. I made dinner and then we watched Megamind. He totally fell asleep while holding me (something about staying up to late the past couple of days. have no idea why that would be. *wink wink*) and it was awesome. We had some more good conversation where we talked about family and stuff, and then we had to say goodnight/goodbye. sigh. There is a HUGE part of me that hates how far away he lives, but at the same time it's going to be good that he lives far away. It means that when we DO get to spend time together, we're really going to make it count.

Monday - While I was at work late Monday afternoon I got a text message from my roommate of a picture of a long-stemmed rose with a note attached. It was for me! Normally on Mondays I leave straight from work and drive to the studio in southern Utah county to teach at 5:30p and then I don't get back until late in the evenings. Well, this particular Monday I had left my iPod at home and so I run home to get it before teaching and so when I was home for that brief moment, I was able to read the sweet little note that Soldier Boy had left me with the rose. It said "Just Because.  P.S. Smell it [it was a fake rose, but smelled like a man's cologne. very good smelling cologne might I add.] P.P.S. I wasn't sure a real one would survive the cold."  Sweet right? sigh. Seriously the most adorable thing I think any boy has ever done for me. We texted back and forth during the evening a bit.

Tuesday - aka last night. He called me - but I was in the shower following my workout that I had had earlier in the evening. I called him back and we talked for 2 hours. This entire conversation was wonderful and filled with all sorts of new information about each other and it was just really, really good. I know the timing is right for this relationship right now - it wouldn't have worked out a few months ago if this had happened then (we both agree on that fact) but here we are. Having a long-distance relationship. Is it what we planned on? Heck no. Are we okay with that? heck yes. It's going to be a fun adventure and I just can't wait to continue on this little path of ours. :o)

so there you go. Soldier Boy. I'm not sure I can (we haven't talked about it) call him my boyfriend yet....but I wouldn't go out with another guy if he asked me out right now. So there you go. :o)  Have a wonderful Wednesday y'all!

Day 1

So...some of you might remember the 21-Day Fashion challenge that I participated in back in late August.

Well, the wonderful April is hosting a Winter Edition that is only 10-days long! I'm really excited about this because I have been getting bored of my closet, but I have a hard time doing something like this challenge on my own. (I know, I should be better and try to do it....but it's just HARD!)

So, today is Day 1: Layers.

So, I went with my white sheer blouse (Kohl's) from the last challenge (it was my mix-in item) with a white DownEast shirt underneath, my brown jean jacket (shopko? who knows, I got it in high school) with my skinny jeans (target) and my awesome brown boots (shoe carnival).  I really like this outfit. I hardly ever wear this jacket. It is a tad on the small side - I don't think I could button it up if I wanted to, and it's very, very stiff which makes it hard to wear.

Hope you all have a fantastic Monday!

p.s. I had a wonderful weekend and time spent with this new boy toy of mine...I'm working on his 'nym and then he'll probably get a Dating Battles post. ;) Have a lovely Monday!

Confuzzled

You guys, I am very confuzzled.

This is going to be a post with lots of thoughts that might be incomplete. You might not know the whole story behind all my thoughts. I'm sorry if that's the case, but I feel the need to share with SOMEONE what is going on and I need to get this written out because maybe it will make more sense. Maybe. I make no guarantees. Also, you can feel welcome to post any advice, but don't feel offended if I disregard it entirely. Remember, you might not know the whole story.

Okay, that being said.....

I like Monkey Man. I really do, but I just don't know if I feel anything deeper. I thought I did, I really did. But then....I don't know it's like someone pushed a button and now I'm not really sure I feel that way. Maybe it's because the thrill has worn off a little bit. Maybe it's because I was super duper emotional all last week, plus I had a slew of extra hormones and the stress of a wedding, my teaching job giving me some grief and teaching relief society weighing heavily on my mind.

This past week there have been more times when I have felt impatient and frustrated with Monkey Man then at any other time in our relationship, but the thing is - we haven't been dating for a super long time. 2.5 months. Which compared to my relationship with SwingKid is like a drop in the bucket. Not that I plan on dating someone for a bazillion years before marrying them....but 2.5 months is not a long time. I know that I don't know everything about him and I realized that in the past few days. We treat different situations VERY differently. We have different thought processes on how certain things should work. It's not on anything that is a deal-breaker for me....but how many of those differences can one have before they equal a deal-breaker?

Before you ask, no I haven't talked to Monkey Man about this. For two reasons 1) I'm still not sure what all of my hang-ups are - I just know they are there and that they seem to be really really big. But that just might be my imagination and 2) I'm nervous that it's going to mean breaking up (or something maybe not! but i just don't know) and doing THAT scares me. Monkey Man is the sweetest guy in the whole wide world and I don't want to hurt him. (Plus I've never had to really break up with someone before. I suck at it.) We get along really well...it's just...I'm not sure if he's someone that I want to be with for forever. He's going out of town in two weeks for a weekend and I think that's going to be really good for me. (even though I just was away from him for 9 days for Christmas...it just....was different then. something changed. Seriously, some elf pushed a button.)

I don't even know what I'm asking, or if I'm asking anything. This is one of those battles in love that bugs me. I just don't know what to do, but right now NOTHING feels right. There's a small part of me that wouldn't mind going on dates with other people right now....and I don't know if that's just because I'm confuzzled and I want to run away from the situation - or if it's a sign that it might be time to move one from this phase of my life. The thing is....I know that if I say anything or suggest even the slightest thing is going to completely blindside this poor, sweet boy. sigh. Any wise words my friends? I certainly could use them.

Top of 2011

okay guys. Here's the deal. Busy is my middle name right now. Part of me loves it and part of me hates it. However, I just don't feel like I can move on and post other things (one of the reasons why I missed Tender Mercy Tuesday yesterday) until I get this out. It just....needs to get done. ;)

So, without further ado, the top 12 posts (one for each month. give or take) of 2011. I hope you enjoy! Stay tuned for 2012's word of the year, a New Year's Eve recap and a few lovely things I've seen lately. see ya on the flip side!

January - What a busy month! I was all over the place, but the thing I remember the most was being brave. :o) What a great way to start off a new year!

February - February always tends to just fly by in my little world. I think part of that is because it is a shorter month (although not by much this year!). I had a few favorite moments from this month, but performing definitely tops the list. Seriously, it was EXACTLY what I needed.

March - Always my favorite month of they year seeing as it hosts my own personal holiday - MY BIRTHDAY! While that's always a highlight in my life, the best thing was definitely the big surprise I had for my sister late in the month. That rocked.

April - Wow, I was really, really busy in April. Ha. I sort of forgot about April MINUS this one little event. :o) Definitely the highlight of my month. ;)

May - May was a good little beginning to my summer of fun in the (non-existent) sun. May was pretty hum-drum but this post pretty much sums up my entire month.


June - I'm pretty sure all hell broke loose in June. I had, hands down, the busiest week of the year that month. Whew. But through-out all the craziness, this little gem popped up.

July - Well....a lot of my summer plans went to pot when I was casted in Aida, but that was one of the funnest things I did during the summer. Add that to the LOADS of confusion from dating multiple people and you have one intense month. Plus I had to host a funeral.

August - This month was, by far, my "bloggiest" month. Meaning, I blogged the most in August. :o) Mostly I think this was because of the 21-day challenge that in which I participated. August was also full of performances and praying I didn't die from sitting.


September - Definitely a month full of me trying to figure out what I wanted in a relationship. That and my self-imposed challenge that has done good things for my life. ;)


October - The most important thing that I remember happening this month was something that has affected my life in a way I didn't think could happen again. :o)


November - November always feels like the beginning of the end to me. Best thing about November? Being twitterpated. (still am btw)


December - Always an insane month around here. Work is crazy, dance is crazy, life is crazy. EVERYONE is CRAZY! Basically, it was a normal month with lots of festivities and what not. :o)

Anyways. 2011 was a rocking year. I definitely feel like I lived up to my word of the year. :o) Have a great day y'all and I'll see you in the VERY near future with loads of THINGS to share with you!!! ciao!

it's official

I'm twitterpated.

You're all probably going, "um....duh Alishka. You've been twitterpated for weeks now."

And this is true...but it's a much deeper twitterpation.

You see, the more time I spend with Monkey Man the more I discover all the great and wonderful things about him. I wouldn't even know where to start in telling you everything that I enjoy about him. I am loving where our relationship is right now and really enjoy having someone call me theirs.

In fact, last night someone said, "I need to find myself an Alishka," and Monkey Man said, "well you can't have this one, she's taken." It was so sweet! sigh. He's just so wonderful and I feel so blessed to have him in my life right now.

We had a very low key weekend, but it was so much fun. I am really looking forward to spending lots of time with him this week. There's volleyball night, dinner with his family, (oh yeah, did I mention that I am eating Thanksgiving dinner w/his family on Thursday night? Well, I am. I'm rather nervous about it) movie night, basketball (maybe) and possibly ice skating and bowling. We'll see about those last two. :o) It's going to be a great week! I'm so excited!!

Hope all of you had a great weekend! :o) Have a lovely Monday.

Tender Mercy Tuesday - 45th Edition

I was so sad to have missed Tender Mercy Tuesday last week, but I'm back this week! I have had a good past couple of weeks filled with so many different tender mercies that it is hard to pick which one(s) to share with you.

Let me start with last week - Last week we had Stake Conference and it was the most wonderful thing. It was exactly what I needed that weekend and it lifted my spirits and answered questions for me in my life. 

My other tender mercy comes from last night. I had to make a decision whether or not to spend some one-on-one time with Monkey Man and most likely stay up late OR go to the gym and get to bed at a decent hour. I had told myself when I got into a relationship again that I didn't want to drop things that I like to do (like going to the gym) just to hang out with my significant other. However, last night I felt like it would be more beneficial to me AND my relationship with Monkey Man if I stayed and hung out with him.

BEST. DECISION. EVER.

Even though I only got 4.5 hours of sleep last night (i know, i know), the benefits of getting to be with Monkey Man were TOTALLY worth it. We watched a movie and after the movie was over, Monkey Man and I sat talking for over an hour and I learned so many things and got to know him even more and I found something out - he's committed to me. I mean, he didn't SAY those words exactly, but we were talking about the holidays and things coming up and Monkey Man told me he'd go to my work Christmas party w/me (we got our save the dates yesterday) and he's already put into his phone when I'm going to be gone to see my family. He told me he'd love it if I took him to DC someday, we're going to do something on New Year’s, he put my birthday in his phone...etc etc. And while that is just a whole bunch of little things that could or could not happen it's a BIG deal to me, because I’ve had past boyfriends that don’t like to commit to things in the future. Lots of guys feel that way. They don’t like to plan for things to far in advance just in case “it doesn't work out.”  I HATED that about those guys (or guys who would never plan ANYTHING *cough Grizzly Bear cough*.) Because, so what if we're not together THEN at least commit now and show me that I'm important to you! And Monkey Man did that. He hinted about meeting his family (well...warned me that I had no idea what they were like yet...and then kind of told me about them. It was fun) Also, he just....is amazing. I could tell when we were talking and discussing things that he cares about me and he wants to plan on spending time with me, and I love that so much. So there you go. A little insight to my current relationship, and while we haven't sat down and had a "DTR," I feel like I know where things stand based off of his actions and to me that is much better than any kind of DTR conversation we could have right now. :o) 

Basically, I'm happy. Monkey Man and I are dating and it's so great. It's gone so smoothly and effortlessly that I can't help but wonder what is in store for us in the future. It's just GOOD and I like it. 

Have a great Tuesday y'all!

best weekend EVER!!!

hey you guys! (every time I say that phrase I say it like THIS. ha ha ha ha)

I hope you had the most fantastic weekend. Mine was, to quote Monkey Man, "sublime."

Friday was just fantastic and filled with great things. Saturday was also great (two straight days of sleeping in? Yes Please!) and was made even better by BYU winning their football game without question.

THEN. Then, there was Ballet West's Dracula. This ballet was absolutely exquisite. The brides of Dracula were very ethereal, creepy and yet gorgeous at the same time. The special effects added to the charm of the storyline and didn't  feel like they were there just because they could be there. (If that makes any kind of sense.) Monkey Man had never been to a ballet before and I just love being able to indoctrinate people into the awesomeness that is ballet. :o) He really enjoyed it, which is a good thing.

So, he held my hand while at the ballet and basically on our entire date. ;) There's just something about holding hands that is so great and it makes me happy. I wore a new top that I found shopping with Roommate A with my long brown skirt and I felt so pretty. After the ballet it was decided that we would go grocery shopping, so we swung by my favorite local grocer and did some shopping. I love grocery shopping and I think it's a lot of fun to do with a guy (for some odd reason.) After that, we went back to his place to take home his groceries and then he walked me out to my car.

Now, here's the deal. I have learned from some very trustworthy sources that Monkey Man has not kissed a lot of people. So, by this point in the evening I was convinced that a kiss was not going to happen (which I was fine with, I mean, I would have been fine either way to be honest) and so I didn't think about it as we were saying good night. So, we say thank you, and as we go in for a hug (i think) I realize about 2.2 seconds too late that Monkey Man was going in to kiss me. GAH! I felt so bad! He kissed me on the cheek and I realized that I had just shafted this really cute, sweet boy. I felt so bad, and so I returned the favor and kissed him on the cheek as well and as we pulled back a little bit he looked at me and then went in for it and this time I didn't shaft him...and we kissed. Just a sweet little peck. a few times. It was adorably sweet and nothing like any other guy I've ever kissed.

See...I feel like when other guys have kissed me it has been leading into the possibility of making out. And not that making out is a bad thing (I do rather enjoy it. TMI? Perhaps?) BUT it was very refreshing to just have him just kiss me.

Now....here's where I wax all philosophical. See....Monkey Man is nothing like any guy that I have ever dated. In fact, when I get to this point in a relationship with a guy, 9 times out of 10 it's because I've been crushing on the guy for quite some time and I've made things known that I wouldn't be opposed to dating said guy. Well....with Monkey Man he sort of came out of nowhere. Not that I didn't like the kid, we were friends before all of this happened, but I hadn't been crushing on him, or sending signals or anything. HE has done all the work. HE has made all of the initial moves. (Now, I have encouraged him....but still.) So...I'm sort of freaking out on the inside. Not on the outside...but definitely in the inside. This relationship is different than ANY relationship I have EVER had and the reason that that is so scary is because people (i.e. every married person I know, including my SISTER) has said that that's how it goes! It's the person you're NOT looking for, the person you DON'T expect to date that gets you married. sigh. I'm trying not to over think things...but let's be honest. I'm a girl. I over think EVERYTHING. So right now...I'm just trying to enjoy this crazy, wild ride that I have suddenly found myself on. So...if it ever sounds like I'm freaking out - just tell me to chill out. k? okay.

REGARDLESS. I'm really, really all sorts of giddy, twitterpatedness over here in Alishka land. Hopefully I can focus. ;) Have a great Monday Y'all!!!

ps. If you read this to the very end then I am very impressed and you deserve a gold star. So consider yourself starred. ;)

Dating Battle Stories - introducing.............

Well, it has been awhile now hasn't it? But the time has come for an introduction of a new player in the Dating Battle Stories of my life....

so without further ado let me introduce:

Monkey Man. (ps thanks to beckybob for the 'nym!)

Monkey Man is in my ward (yes that does bring the current number of NAMED crushes on this blog from my ward to three. I'm a player, it's okay.). He helps organize/attends game nights that are sometimes held after ward prayer. He's a complete sweetheart and very genuine.

There's a little background - but now for the fun part. the STORY!

I was sitting at home Saturday night, not doing much of anything, when Monkey Man called me. I figured he was calling to see if we were going to do a game night the next night, but I was wrong! Instead, he asked me if I was available on Wednesday night. Fortunately, my plans were changed and I was in fact available! He asked if I'd like to go on a group date w/him to carve pumpkins and play Xbox Kinnect. I said yes, and so now he's picking me up at 7pm tonight.

BUT WAIT! That's not all folks!

Last night for FHE the plan was to meet at the church and then go from there to a corn maze at Thanksgiving Point. We're standing around outside and Monkey Man and I are standing by each other just chit-chatting and the opening prayer is said and THEN it's time to carpool up...so I say "I have room for 4 in my car!" and Monkey Man turns to me and says so fast "I'm coming with you!" and i was all "sweet!" and then my car filled up with three other girls from the ward and off we went!

So we get to the corn maze and Monkey Man and I are waiting for the rest of the ward to show up and it was MUCH colder than I had anticipated (i.e. i didn't bring gloves or hat and all i had was two lightweight sweatshirts to keep me warm). So I lean into into Monkey Man and tell him he's going to have to keep me warm and he says, "only if you keep me warm too!" so then we get our wristbands, I chit-chat with the bishop for a moment about some concerns (YAY for being the RSP ha ha ha) and then I skip over to Monkey Man and we start walking towards where the corn maze is at. Here's the thing about the Thanksgiving Point corn maze - there are a TON of fall activities to do besides the corn maze. lots of fun things. So we're walking across the field and Monkey Man leans in and says "I'm going to hold your hand to keep mine warm okay?" with a cheesy grin on his face. ha ha ha. I say okay and off we went! we held hands the entire night. There were times where we'd let go of hands to do something, come back to standing by each other and HE would grab my hand again. it was adorable. So....I like him - which is funny because the like/crush sort of came out of NOWHERE. but last night...it was so fun. :o)

My other favorite thing is that he made it clear last night that he is going to come and pick me up - he's not having me just meet him at his place. This is a BIG deal to me and has been a sore spot in past relationships that I have been in.

So. There you go. The newest player in this game/war of love that I'm very involved in right now. ;) I promise to give as many details as I feel like after the date tonight. he he he he

just another....

MANIC MONDAY!!!

Seriously, it is crazy around here peeps. Work has just been one thing after another all day long. sigh. At least I can rest easy knowing that there are just two hours until my evening.

I have so much to blog about...I think we're going to need bullet points.....

• game night last night? EPIC. Seriously. At one point it was down to four of us and we played Go Fish! when is the last time YOU played Go Fish? (granted, this was a child version of go fish...with pictures of fishes and what not. not the real life GROWN UP version. WHO KNEW there was grown up version of Go Fish?!!) For me...it had been quite sometime. We had to read the rules. Also, we were hilarious playing this game. It was honestly one of my favorite moments of game nights so far.

• Surfer Boy....is my friend. And for now, i'm okay with that. At some point we might be more...but for now we are friends. Which is good. I want to marry my best friend. :o)

• I learned some interesting things about some back story on Blindman2 (remember him?). It makes me want to continue giving him a chance. I think I'll be seeing him in a couple of weeks with our mutual friends. We'll see what goes down at that point.

• I get to go to Tuachan this weekend! I AM SO EXCITED!!!! I can deal with ANYTHING at work this week if only because I'll be "out of town" for a mere 24 hours. :o)

• We've started having "ward prayer" again on Sunday evenings. I just LOVE going to this. There have been times in my life where I have despised ward prayer and have refused to go. Not anymore!

• TV Fall Season Premieres are upon us!!! I'm rather excited for my two favorite shows: Castle and The Big Bang Theory. YAY for fun things again!!!!

• I think I mentioned this the other day...but i'm totally doing my challenge for another week. It rocked my world last week, I'm going to make it rock again this week. :o)

• I'm going to go see 17 Miracles tonight. Don't be surprised if it shows up in my tender mercy post tomorrow. I have a feeling it could....

• I was visiting teaching this weekend and I read this quote in the message. It's how I'm going to live my life: “We prepare each day, right now, for eternal life. If we are not preparing for eternal life, we are preparing for something less, perhaps something far less.” - Elder M. Russell Ballard

I'm not sure if that's everything or not. oh well. Enjoy the rest of your Monday!

i know, i know

two posts in one. whatever are you going to do with me? BUT I just needed to blog right now, so here I am, blogging.

by the way, if you follow me in a reader - I changed things up around here and made it feel like Fall. I love Fall. I am very much excited to do Fall-type things in the coming weeks.

Also, I've mentioned before about how I get a kick out of reading my horoscope, and today's is no different. see:

Your dreams work out quite nicely in your head, Alishka, but the problem now is turning them into some sort of real life scenario. Be careful of taking too much of an intellectual approach. When it comes to relationships, things don't normally happen logically or rationally. You are going to have to leave a great deal up to chance, so just learn to deal with things as they come.

Have I ever mentioned how much I hate chance? Let's get real here for just a moment. There's a boy. (It's always about a boy, isn't it? Deal with it.) His name? Surfer Boy. Surfer Boy and I have enjoyed several times together where much flirting has ensued (sometimes just the two of us, sometimes in groups) and I feel like there's a strong possibility that he's interested.  My dear friend Bagginswulf (I may or may not have mentioned him before. oh well...we met a long time ago and have a great friendship. He's my go to for advice on boys and I like to think I'm his go to for advice on girls. that may or may not be true. ;) ) and I were talking about this today. He said he thinks there are a few things that Surfer Boy could be thinking:

• Perhaps he's interested, but he thinks you're busy. 
• Perhaps he's interested, but he thinks you're not. (Unlikely.) 
• Perhaps he's not interested. 
• Perhaps he's somewhat interested, but he's not sure how interested yet. 
• Perhaps he's not interested, but he could be interested, given more time with you.

So how does one decide what to do when there are so many perhapses in the equation?! It's like there are 5 variables and I only know what 2 of the variables equal! I know from my great expansive knowledge in the world of alegbra that if you have more than one variable and you don't have values for all the variables, it's mostly impossible to solve for all the variables - at least not with a real numbers! (i'm not sure that makes sense. I don't care. Mvoing on.)

Bagginswulf told me I just have to weigh "1.) How much you want to be asked out vs. 2.) How much you want to spend time with him."

Sigh.

My biggest problem is always figuring out what I WANT. Well....I know what I want....but trying to figure out what is more important to me when I can't have exactly what I want is HARD.

Sometimes I wish there was either a) a magic wand that I could just wave and get what  I want or b) someone to tell me what I should do in this exact situation. Instead I'll just ask for the blogging world's opinion. I may or may not do what you suggest.

Ready. Set. Go!! ;)

Dating Battle Stories: A girly story about Surfer Boy

 

The title is not meant to meant that Surfer Boy is girly. No, what it means is that I am very girly and what I am about to post is full of me being a girly girl and reading into every little thing that happened this weekend with Surfer Boy. Okay, maybe not EVERY little thing, but close. :o)

Okay. Starting at the beginning - Friday. Movie night. Hosted by Home Teacher (a boy who is my home teacher and will be referenced as such) he invited several people to his house to watch a movie that we would vote on. Movie night was slated to start at 7 pm. I texted Home Teacher to let him know that I would be late...I don't get done teaching until 5:45, and I had run earlier and so I needed to shower and such. I get to his house at 7:30p. This is who was there: Home Teacher (sitting on a 2-person couch on the left side of the living room) Mr. Toad (a guy in the ward, he's a nice guy, but just a friend and he was sitting in a lazy boy chair) and then Surfer Boy (sitting on a 2-person couch on the right side of the living room). So yeah, me and 3 guys. Awesome. I was still a little sore from my workout and so I sat in the middle of the floor and stretched and such. Shortly into our movie (The Incredibles) I scooched towards Surfer Boy's couch and put my back up against it. About 20 minutes after that, I jumped up into the couch. Next to Surfer Boy. and more next to Surfer Boy then not next to Surfer Boy if you get my drift. ;)

the movie continues. Surfer Boy leans into me and whispers "touch my shirt" okay, then. Don’t have to ask ME twice! I touch it. SOFTEST SHIRT EVER. Surfer Boy tells me it's Egyptian cotton. I swoon. I touch him again. Several times. (Throughout the movie of course. he laughs at me) Surfer Boy and I both get up at different times during the movie to grab a drink, or use the bathroom, or get a treat or whatever. Every time we come back, we sit next to each other. Like our whole sides were touching, but we weren't holding hands or anything. I was trying to mirror him. At one point he had his hand on his knee, very much open for hand holding. HOWEVER, I wasn't going to make that first move. But, I sat very similarly to him. ;) (I like to think that if it had been just the two of us and there hadn't been two other boys in the room he might have held my hand.)Also, he put his hand on my knee at one point to just pat it in regards to something I said. I’m pretty sure I swooned in that moment too. ANYWAYS, it was good times. I liked it. We got to talking about weekend plans, and I mentioned how much I wanted to go to the zoo...and so it was decided we would go to the zoo on Monday. Probably followed by a shooting expedition (since I’d never been. plus they claimed it to be fun.)

So that was Friday. Moving on to Sunday.

After Ward Prayer a bunch of us always gets together for a game night. I sat by Surfer Boy and played with him. This is when I discovered that Surfer Boy is VERY ticklish. Like, just as ticklish as me. So, I had fun with that and he promised to get me back on Monday at the zoo.

Monday - the zoo. With Grizzly Bear and Surfer Boy (and others). Not going to lie, I probably ignored Grizzly Bear a little bit more than I should have. He tried to pay for my ticket to get into the zoo, but I wasn't about to let him make it into a date. It would have been just awkward to have him pay for me. So I told him no. Probably hurt his feelings, especially when I didn't really hang out by him so much at the zoo. The zoo was me, Surfer Boy, Home Teacher, Mr. Toad S and Grizzly Bear. so...yeah. Definitely walked more by Surfer Boy than anybody, but overall just had a blast. We went to lunch and then Cabela's and THEN the boys took me shooting. Well, first we had to go get Surfer Boy's truck and guns and so he asked if anyone wanted to ride with him and I said, (after waiting a few seconds) "I will!" so...I did. LOVED that I got that little bit of alone time with Surfer Boy. We drove down to Springville and went up the canyon and I learned how to shoot a pistol and a shotgun (2 different kinds) I have a bruise on my shoulder forming from the shotguns, but it was SO FUN. Also, Surfer Boy kind of did the whole, hold my arms and help me thing. It was cute. I sat by Surfer Boy at FHE, but that was it. My plan: to not worry about him. I will flirt with him on Sunday, but I know he has some family coming into town this weekend and his roommate is getting married. So basically I'm just going to chill and hopefully he'll ask me out sometime in the future. I know we'll have some more movie nights (there are so many movies I haven't seen that he wants me to see). I'm just hoping we get to watch a movie again but just with the two of us. Heaven knows I need to not ask him out again for a while though. I really hope things sort of go somewhere so I can feel okay about asking him to go to the ballet with me at the end of October. :o)

so there you go....my weekend of adventures. I REALLY like Surfer Boy. LIKE A LOT. I just hope he has taken note of my flirty nature with him (cause it's mostly different compared to my flirty nature with other boys.)

disappearing act

so remember how I was SO excited about my date with BM2? Well he called me yesterday on my lunch break to cancel. Basically he told me he wasn't in a place to date right now, he doesn't want to lead me on so we're not going out this weekend or anytime in the very near future. We're going to stay friends because he thinks I'm awesome and stuff. Plus he said he wants to be ready to date soon and when he is we might try things out then. So for now...we're friends and we'll hang out in the future and stuff. (and before you freak out and say, "Why Alishka, why?" or "He's just stupid." He had very good, personal reasons that he shared with me that I'm not gong to share with you. so there.)

while I was initially very much saddened by this turn of events, I think it's going to be good. I told my mom and one of the first things she said to me was the following: "With as many guys as let you go suddenly, Heavenly Father must have someone very special for you that isn't quite ready."

I tend to agree with my mommy. She's usually right. ;) Also, my life has kind of been a crazy roller coaster lately. I've come >this< close to having an emotional break-down for the stupidest reasons, but then again, that's how I roll. See I let the smallest things - the tiniest thorns inbed themselves inside of me and then they fester, because they're small and practically non-existent, I ignore them. Before long there is a huge collection of thorns inside of me and then the stupidest thing will push me over and I'll just break. I was sort of there at the beginning of this week. I need to be better about not letting things fester, and it's a goal of mine to do this.

Anyways, the point of me telling you all of this is I'm not going to worry about dating for a while. In fact, I'm kind of going to just step away. I'm going to continue my friendships with people I know and I plan on doing fun things all the time. However, I need to find my balance again. The musical has definitely thrown off my balance and with the ballet school year in full swing I need to figure out how life is going to go. I have major responsibilitiesat church and work and I need o put some focus on those things and make sure I'm not letting any balls drop. This does not mean that I'm just going to stop dating - if a boy asks me out I'll say yes. I'm just not going to worry about it at all. Nor am I going to renew my subscription on the dating site I've been using.

I think that's all I want to say about the subject for now. :o) Have a great day y'all!

I'm such a girl

in case you didn't know that already. :o)

I was listening to songs on my iPod the other day while working away on stuff. I think I was at work, but I don't really remember at this moment. Anyways, it doesn't really matter because the point is that I was listening to some tunes and the song "Fearless" by Taylor Swift came on. I love me some Taylor Swift. You might hate me because I just said that, but I won't take it back. Her stuff is clean, fun to sing along with, and I can often relate to her lyrics.

Anyways, I was listening to "Fearless" and I realized how much I want to be that way - fearless. In everything I do, but mostly in relationships. I thought I was hunky dory all fine and dandy after SwingKid broke up with me, but I've recently realized that I am in no hurry to get into anything super serious. I want to have a boyfriend - but I want the timing to be right. AND I want him to instill certain feelings in my heart and soul. I want to feel like I can do anything when I am with him. I want to be...dare I say it? FEARLESS.

There's somethin' 'bout the way the street looks when it's just rained
There's a glow off the pavement, you walk me to the car
And you know I wanna ask you to dance right there
In the middle of the parking lot, yeah

We're drivin' down the road, I wonder if you know
I'm tryin' so hard not to get caught up now
But you're just so cool, run your hands through your hair
Absent-mindedly makin' me want you

And I don't know how it gets better than this
You take my hand and drag me headfirst, fearless
And I don't know why but with you I dance
In a storm in my best dress, fearless

So baby drive slow 'til we run out of road
In this one horse town, I wanna stay right here
In this passenger seat, you put your eyes on me
In this moment, now capture it, remember it

'Cause I don't know how it gets better than this
You take my hand and drag me headfirst, fearless
And I don't know why but with you I'd dance
In a storm in my best dress, fearless

Well, you stood there with me in the doorway
My hands shake, I'm not usually this way
But you pull me in and I'm a little more brave
It's the first kiss, it's flawless, really somethin'
It's fearless

'Cause I don't know how it gets better than this
You take my hand and drag me headfirst, fearless
And I don't know why but with you I'd dance
In a storm in my best dress, fearless

'Cause I don't know how it gets better than this
You take my hand and drag me headfirst, fearless And I don't know why but with you I'd dance
In a storm in my best dress, fearless 

So, basically, I'm just a girl who wants to feel breathless, excited, and fearless around the man of her dreams. Have I met the man of my dreams? I have no idea. It's quite possible I have. At the same time, he could still be out there, waiting for me. I'm in no rush to run off and get married. While I'd love for it to happen to me, I know that I am exactly where I need to be in my life. I'm not supposed to be married right now. I have other responsibilities and tasks that I must complete first. So for right now, I'm just going to keep on doing what I do, enjoying and LIVING my life the way I like to live it until the right man can get me to dance in the storm, in my best dress.

yeah, I'm a girl...and proud of it!

Tender Mercy Tuesday - 31st Edition

Friends, I am so very blessed. Truly, very blessed. I love being able to take time each Tuesday to reflect on my life and all the small blessings that I have been given each day. I've had many blessings the past few days and I want to share them with you.

• I am getting a new calling at church and I'm rather excited about it. It's not going to be easy for me, but I always like a challenge. The tender mercy with this has been the personal revelation I've already received in conjunction with my calling. It feels good to know that Heavenly Father is looking out for me.

• My social life is such a blessing. Percy and I ended up moving our lunch date to today and it was so good to see him again. He's such a great guy and I love being able to spend time with him - even if it is so sporadic right now. I also have had fun times going one other dates here and there. I don't know where anything is going with any of these guys and that's okay right now. I definitely feel the need to take a little bit of time and step back and analyze my feelings for everyone involved. I feel bad because I want to go out with everyone every weekend - but I just can't do that right now. I literally have no time for anything in the evenings. Hopefully none of the guys think I'm blowing them off...except for Grizzly Bear. He can think that, since I'm definitely not interested in him in that way.

• I'm getting a new roommate next week. Some of you might remember the hubabaloo trying to get a 3rd roommate last year - this year it was a piece of cake. I hope she's nice and fits into the groove we have. I'm just thankful that we were able to sell her portion of the contract so quickly.

In the long run - I'm feeling very blessed. I have amazing friends that I can talk to and share my thoughts and feelings on life.

Just a side note on this whole dating thing - I think I'm realizing that dating is HARD. ha ha ha, I mean, I knew that already and what not - but things with SwingKid were so quick and easy that we didn't have to deal with the hard stuff of going out with other people at the same time, wondering about feelings, showing affection, etc.  And now....now I have to do all those things. In some ways it is a lot of fun to date a lot of people and stuff like that but it confuses my head and my heart. At some point I know I need to make decisions but for now I'm just going to focus on the musical. and my new calling. :)