Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Life Changes

It is interesting to me how life changes. 6 years ago I was struggling as a Freshman at BYU trying to figure out what I needed to do in order to get good grades. 2 years ago I was in the beginnings of my relationship with SwingKid, getting ready for graduation, and trying to decide what to do with my life.  One year ago I was prepping for knee surgery after dealing with my first major injury in my dancing career.  Today I am a working professional in a customer service job, I teach ballet and am a co-director for a ballet company that is my alma mater. Today, I have a boyfriend of 2+ years and I'm still trying to figure out what I am going to keep doing for the rest of my life.  It's odd how for so many years of my life it was all about college. The relationship drama, the single's ward drama, the dance department drama, etc. Most days had some kind of rhythm to them and yet at the same time were different in their own unique way. (especially as my schedule got more convoluted my last few semesters.) Today, each day is basically the same. Days vary a little bit with what I have to do at work (but not by much) and my classes that I teach are different each day - but yet each day seems much like the one before it. 

How do you keep growing when life feels the same? I am a real-life adult now and I'm not sure how that happened. This is my life right now and I'm just not sure what I want from it.

Anyways. Life is really good, it really is. I do like the day-to-day things that I have on my plate and heaven knows I love teaching. Sometimes I just wonder if there is something else I should or could be doing with my life, but I guess that's how it goes huh? We always wonder about our current circumstances. We just have to trust that we are doing everything we possibly can and create goals to help us grow and learn and live a very full life. It's not always easy to do that....but I am going to do my darn best to find fullfillment in my life NOW and not wait for it to come sometime down this road I am on.

PS. Today is my little bro C's birthday. He is 18. Happy Birthday bro. :o)

one year ago


Brian said...

You know, there was a time in my life when I had similar feelings. I had graduated, was working and doing a lot to help others in my area, but I just wasn't having any satisfaction in what I was doing. I've found for myself, when I feel a longing for something else, it's usually God trying to send me a message I need to make a course correction of some sort.

I think the key is finding what brings you the most satisfaction and trying to maximize it in your life. God knows this and can direct us to find it. For myself, it involved a change in perspective and career goals. For others it could be changing your hair color, making more art, spending more time with family, etc. Or it could be something as simple as a change in attitude. Who knows. But I hope you have fun looking!

As for being an adult, it can be tedious or stressful at times, but it sure is rewarding. Enjoy the adventure!