love

I think I love someone. Now I don't know how to describe it though. I think he's decided to do something, another relationship with another girl; however, I don't want to see him get hurt. he has his agency and can decide to go through with this if he decides to, but I care about him enough that it will hurt me (and in a way make me happy) if he gets burned b/c of this decision. I love him. I really do. We haven't really 'dated' we're just friends and cuddle buddies, but I wonder what would happen if we did date. That could prove interesting. Very interesting indeed. Hmmm....anyways just some frustrations. I am practicing a lot of restraint right now, b/c I want more than anything to text him or email him and see how he's doing, but I know that I need to wait for him to come to me, after what I am pretty sure I know what happened last night. I get butterflies thinking about it, and I’ve been worried about him for the past couple of days. We had a really good chat on Monday, 3.5 hours, we talked about some serious issues, but yet the conversation was so lighthearted and now looking back on it, it was kind of a weird conversation. Anywho....this is just a whole lot of babble, and I’m trying to distract myself, cause work is slow, and I want to contact him, oh my gosh!!! He just emailed me! Hurray! And he has stories about what happened last night, oh gosh, now I am nervous. *sigh* well at least he let me know kind of in a way that he wants to talk lol....until later. coolio.