I'm baaaack....almost

Hey friends! It's been a while hasn't it? :o) Life has been extremely ________ (pick your favorite adjective; I'm pretty sure it will fit. :P )

Seriously though, last time I left you with lists of things I HAVE done and things that were HAPPENING and yada yada yada. Since it's has just about been three weeks since I last wrote, I thought you deserved a little update.

so here you go a few things I have done (some picture proof...)

• I have officially moved out of my place of living in O*. I lived there for 3 years. It was good to me, until it came time to clean. Seriously? Cleaning that place was AWFUL. Luckily I'm done and I don't care anymore.

• SAW MY FAMILY!! to celebrate, we grilled pizza: 

• Drove to New Mexico....and back: 

• on the way back I kissed my boyfriend in all 4 states at one time:

• THEN I became homeless. You guys, being homeless sucks. Granted, I have somewhere to stay and all that jazz, but not having a place that is MINE is just not so much fun. :( 

• OH! I went to Soldier Boy's Family reunion. We went camping at Beaver Mountain and took a day trip to the North Shore of Bear Lake. HOLY MOLY is Bear Lake GORGEOUS! I had never been before and it was SO SO SO great. Unfortunately, I left all kinds of photo taking devices packed in a box/in my purse/in my car so there is no photo documentation...but it was FUN TIMES.

• My boyfriend? He's amazing. He had his daughter this past weekend (well, a little bit longer, but I digress) and he's just  the most amazing dad. Seriously, it warms my soul to see him interacting with her. I can't wait to have kids with him and all that jazz.

• also, my boyfriend puts up with my random emotional outbursts. I've had my share of them these past few weeks and I've been rather stressed and such and have had more than one crying session. Luckily for me, Soldier Boy lets me cry on his shoulder and holds me until I am better.

I think that's it for now. I'm sure I'm missing things...but once I'm moved in to my new apartment and I have some kind of internet I will check back in with you...until next time, keep smiling! :o)

Tender Mercy Tuesday - 56th Edition

Sometimes I dread doing my Tender Mercy Tuesday posts - I just don't feel like doing them on occasion, but it is always those times when I really DO need to do said meme posts. I always find myself more thankful for the little things in my life that help keep me happy.

Today's small thing is actually two small things. See...I was having a rough night yesterday. I was letting my emotions get the better of me and was struggling with a few personal matters. I knew that the doubts I were having were pointless - doubts don't come from God, but it didn't matter, I was still doubting and hesitating. Then, I read this quote that Roommate R left on my doorstep over a year ago when I was going through a hard time.

"Things work out; it isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out, don't worry. I say that to myself every morning. It will all work out. If you do your best, it will all work out. Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. If we will put our trust in him, if we will pray to him, if we will live worthy of his blessings, he will hear our prayers." - President Gordon B. Hinckley

I love this quote. It always reminds me that everything will work out. I just need to do those things necessary to stay faithful to the gospel of Jesus Christ. 

My second thing is Soldier Boy. We talked for just a few minutes last night (unlike the normal hour or two that we usually go for) mostly because he wanted to make sure I got the sleep I needed. (he's way too good to me) I was happy just to hear his voice and get to talk to him even if it was only for a few minutes. Then I woke up this morning and noticed that he had texted me several hours later. That text message was filled with the exact words I was needing to hear. He's just so sweet and tender to me and knows exactly what I need and when I need it. I'm so grateful to have him in my life. :o)

Have a great Tuesday all!

How I deal....

I can usually handle a break-up pretty well. usually being the key word.

This time around has been interesting since I saw the other side of breaking-up. I have found myself still going through the same grief cycle and what not.

First thing that's always on my agenda? New shoes. Oh and did these new shoes deliver...please observe:

Hot, no? I am so in love with these gold glitter stilettos. They make me tall, add some pizzaz to any outfit and are just plain AWESOME.

Next thing on my agenda is to immerse myself in crafty projects and hang out with all my friends. Done and done. I finished my sister's wedding gift (a wedding album of everything from their wedding. I am so awesome) and gave it to her this weekend. I hung out with Surfer Boy and other peeps from my ward and basically just had a fun time.

The next thing that usually happens after a break-up is that I begin to miss having a boyfriend but don't necessarily miss the boy I was dating specifically. I am currently in that phase. It is always a hard phase to get out of, but I will persevere. :o) Today I'm doing that by reminding myself of the awesomeness through a few quotes. Enjoy and have a marvelous Martin Luther King Jr. Day (I SO wish I had the day off. :( )

a relief with sadness sandwich

So. I'm currently chowing down on a relief with sadness sandwich. I know, it doesn't sound like the most exciting sandwich in the world, but it is one filled with everything that my mind, heart, and soul need right now.

Last night I broke up with Monkey Man. Sad, I know. But it had to happen. See....things just weren't jiving for me anymore. There's a whole lot of reason to why I broke up with him, but a lot of it is SO personal that I just don't feel comfortable sharing it here. I do know that it was the right thing to do - without a doubt. It was sad to see his face fall when I told him the things I needed to tell him, but he took it graciously and didn't put up a fight. I don't know what I was expecting, maybe more tears? I'm a really hard person to break up with and so I just figured it could quite possibly be like that. Luckily, it wasn't and after I left his house I drove down to see Sister B and her hubby. We talked a bit and finished a puzzle that's been on their table since Thanksgiving. :o)

After I got home I saw this quote twice in two different places within 5 minutes of each other:

While it isn't perfect, I do feel like it describes what I did. The courage that it took to do what I did didn't roar. And here I am tyring again....not in the same way - but I am not going to wallow. I am not going to throw myself a pity party because I KNOW that what I did was right. I KNOW that there are other things out there for me and I KNOW that I'm going to be okay. I just have to keep on trying. And try I will. My dear friend blogged about courage and having to choose between things that are "good" and things that are "best." Not always an easy choice as I have found out. Her words of wisdom rang true to me last night and this I know..... I will try again tomorrow. Until another time my friends, God bless.

Tender Mercy Tuesday - 40th Edition

Yesterday was a very good day. It was filled with my favorite things - a quick work day, good food, a great workout and flirting at FHE. PLUS as an added bonus there was a bonfire and s'mores! Lovely!

Today....today is not a very good day. at all. I am struggling to be positive, to stay happy and focused. Part of me just wanted to skip over the Tender Mercy Tuesday, but then I remembered things that happened this last week and I couldn't skip it, no matter how terrible of a mood I am in.

You know how hard it is to think of something that has blessed your life when you're having a bad day? It's REALLY hard. It's so easy to focus on the hard things on life and to let that rule your emotions. I try so hard to not let this happen, but sometimes my emotions get the better of me. le sigh.

Anyhow, I mentioned this yesterday, but it is worth mentioning again because it has had SUCH an impact on me. President Uchtdorf spoke to the women of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on Saturday evening and it was the most marvelous message. His thoughts were things that I had been thinking about a lot as of late and have been praying for guidance on daily. I am constantly amazed at the ability for one talk to touch SO many lives and answer questions for people in all wakes of life. This is a message that I know I'm going to return to time and time again.

And just like that the sun is shining just a tad brighter in my life. Here's hoping it continues to grow brighter.

Hello Monday

Well....we had what I am calling "Closing Night Part One" on Saturday night. It was a crazy night with a microburst storm attacking us about 20 minutes into the show. Luckily for us this microburst was just wind and no rain and the show went on! Huzzah!

Yesterday was an emotional day for me. I was exhausted physically and there was a lot on my mind so I quickly got exhausted emotionally. When I went to bed last night shortly after 10:30pm I was a mess. Luckily, I read this amazing talk by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, "Because of Your Faith ." This talk was exactly what I needed to hear last night. I slept like a rock (I guess there was a crazy rain storm early this morning - I didn't hear a thing!) Today should be a good day, albeit insanely busy.

In other news, today is Day One of the 21 Day Challenge. This week's prompts were posted on Saturday and yesterday the first in depth post for day one was posted. Today's challenge is to pick an item of clothing to Remix during this challenge. I love the idea of remixing and already have plans to do my own remixing challenge once I've finished this 21 day challenge. My item of clothing that I picked to remix: a sheer white shirt. I bought this shirt originally for Sister B's wedding but then decided I hated it (well, at least for her wedding). I want to wear it more so it's my remix item. Today I'm wearing it paired with my favorite pair of jeans, a green DownEast cap sleeved shirt and a pair of  flats that are flowery.

(shoes not pictured)

This is how I normally wear this shirt....so here's hoping I can figure out a few different ways to wear it in the next three weeks!! :o)

In other news it's the audition for my ballet company today - I can't believe summer vacation is basically over. Classes start this week. I'm excited for the new year, but wishing I had about 3 more weeks of no ballet classes and no musical....oh well! The musical has definitely been fun times and I am SO glad that I got to participate in it. Although at this point, I'm not going to lie, I'm excited for it to be over. We're at BYU's Education Week and I believe there are still a few tickets available if you haven't gotten the opportunity to see me perform yet. :o)

I think that's all folks. At least for now. :o) I am so scatter-brained that I'm sure I'm forgetting something....but that's how I feel about 90% of the time these days. :P Have a great Monday!

expressions of my emotions at this exact moment

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Tender Mercy Tuesdsay - 28th Edition

Hi there. It's been a long weekend. Full of fun in the sun, fun with friends, fun with family, and fun with boys. I promise to give you a full recap later - I'm sure you want to hear about all the fun fun fun fun I had...in the meantime I want to take a moment and be thankful for how well my Heavenly Father knows me.

See...even with all the fun I had this weekend I struggled with a few things emotionally. Mainly related to past relationships and where things could have been if we were still together. I don't really want to go in to a lot of detail because it's not needed. I've worked through the emotional angst and I know that I'll be okay, but that doesn't mean that this weekend wasn't hard. One of the harder ones I've had to be honest.

However, Heavenly Father knows me SO WELL that he made sure I had friends who made plans with me, family who called ME and asked me to spend the holiday with THEM and basically HE made sure that I had a well of support around me through all my hard moments. It made getting through my thoughts and emotions that much easier because I had people I could talk to who understood where I was coming from right then.  How grateful I am for that tender mercy.