Tuesday, January 04, 2011

Tender Mercy Tuesday

One month ago today my life turned upside down. I was tossed about in crashing waves of a break-up that hurt more than I ever thought possible.

One month ago I said good-bye to the person I loved.

One month ago I discovered that there is more to me than being the other half of a relationship.

One month ago I had outpourings of love from unlikely places.

One month ago I decided that I would embody D&C 6:36

One month ago I discovered that I could be happy again.

That is my Tender Mercy today. Without knowing it the breakup that tore my world upside down, the one that I thought would kill me turned out to be one of the better things to happen to me. I know that sounds awful and part of me hates saying that I am so much happier right now. I loved SwingKid, I really did. (and to be honest I still do. a part of me will always love him) However, our relationship had reached a stalemate point. Neither of us was moving or going anywhere we were just frozen in time with each other.

Life is not meant to be lived in stalemate. Life is to be full of changes and challenges.  We need to be moving and growing in order to feel fulfilled. I didn't realize it then but my life was not being fulfilled. My life seemed to be in limbo (side note: you definitely need to follow that link Heather does a great job describing how I was feeling in SO MANY WAYS) and I didn't know where I was going.

I know where I am going now. I have a purpose. I am FLOURISHING. I still miss SwingKid. My heart still aches for him in the still moments of my life. However, I don't hate him for doing what he did to my heart. In fact, I respect him a lot for having the courage to act on the realization that we were in stalemate. This event was necessary for me to realign myself with my path in life. I am back on my path.

Finally, let me leave you with this little tidbit from Mormon Messages. It is so wonderful and a great reminder to all of us about moving forward.

2 comments:

Brian said...

I agree with what you said about Limbo. Not developing is not progressing, and it feels uncomfortable. We are thrilled you are flourishing now!

Heather said...

You go, girl! I think I should probably make "flourish" my word of the year too. =)

I'm glad you're back on your path. I'm working on getting a solid footing on mine so I think I can relate.

Side note: Lexi (remember her?) told me that when you were home for the holidays, you weren't that far from us in MD! I thought that was pretty cool. =)